The funny thing that happened at work.

The back Story:

For the past few years' we've been plagued with a lunch thief at work. For the most part no one shared with each other that random items of lunch would go missing and just assumed that it was just a random happenstance. Then one day I was in the break room making myself a delicious toast & jam for breakfast.

I was stirring my jam with my sweet plastic knife spreading my toast and then licking the knife. I'm not talking just a quick lick, it was a full wet-dog kiss like lick on the knife, then back in to the jar it goes. I did this a few times just minding my own business when another lady I work with started watching me. I just kept on doing what I was doing until dumb-foundedly my co-worker looked at me and said "What the HELL are you doing?" I replied "Oh, people keep eating my jams when I bring them in, I don't know who, so this is my way to sticking it to 'em." My co-worker started roaring with laughter, you know, the belly laugh, because she thought that was the best idea ever.

We then started talking about missing food items and come to find out she too was a victim of food thief. Her stories were much worse than my missing jam. She had actual items missing from her lunch sack that had her name all over it. She even left notes in her lunch snack saying "don't touch" and "If it's not yours don't eat it." and my personal favorite.... "FUCK YOU!"

This started to open the conversation and we then learned that almost everyone was experiencing food theft, some are more angry then others. I am annoyed but at the same time find it rather sad/funny that this is going on with grown adults.

That brings us to today's events....

Or, should I say yesterdays, since it started yesterday.

I brought in a PB&J wrap (with apples) I ate a little less than half the wrap and then decided to put it in the break room refrigerator. It has been noted that most food items that have been a product of thievery have been in one of the fridges.

I took my half eaten wrap, wrapped it paper towel and then put it in a plastic bag with my name in all capitals the length of the bag. Two of my other co-works were in the break room as I was putting this away. They two had been victims of food thieves. I said I'm putting this right up front to be temping, because it looks like it could be delicious burrito but it is not.

I left it there until this afternoon, I was heading to my car when I had the notion that I should return to the fridge to throw out my PB&J with apples wrap. If it has not been swiped from the fridge then it surely should be thrown out by this time. I found my sammy, in a new position in the fridge (nothing odd that happens all the time) then I pulled it out, check, there's my name, as I was crossing the room to waste basket I looked at the sammy and then realized it was shorter and the paper towel was wrapped differently.

No. fucking. way.

I opened the bag, pulled it out and unwrapped the wrap.

Yes, fucking way.

Someone did in fact take bites out of my wrap, then wrapped it back up (differently so much differently that it set me off to know there was something wrong) and put it back in the fridge.

It then took me an extra hour to leave work because naturally I had to run down to my co-worker who caught me licking my knife and tell her of the sammy with a few bites missing.

Oh, food thievery it is so on now.